 With strong political views on recent American politics and the ongoing stress of the pandemic, there can be tension in the household and especially when a generational and cultural gap is involved. Here is a compact psychological guide to help you converse better in difficult situations. Firstly, you must assess the situation at hand and decide what approach is appropriate. If a healthy conversation is possible, I highly recommend applying these tools and tips and in return will help you grow stronger and braver. When conversations are impossible Assess the situation, if a conversation is likely to go wrong you must be mindful of your own health and safety. These assessments must include things like your physical and mental health severity, your right for a safe space and the safety of others around you. Avoiding conversations are a way to reduce short-term stress and protect yourself and others from potential harm.
When conversations are possible It is good to know that avoiding conversations can reduce short-term stress however avoidance can lead to lacking the necessary skills to engage in healthy conversations in the future and in real world scenarios. By remembering to engage, you will be able to learn and develop skills as well as recognising ways to improve and carry conversations better.
When conversations have ended Have some faith, it is not common that first conversations are mind changing. Give yourself and them time to think and reflect.
You’d be feeling like better communicator than before and with each attempt of a difficult conversation you will be exposed to tools in which will help you in the future. It is best to engage in healthy, safe and productive conversations as a way of personal growth and can help immensely in the long run however some things are better avoided. These can include if you are at risk of your own health or the health of the people around you. One final point and from my personal experience, keep these conversations as interpersonal practice for the real outside world. References: APA. (2019, November 15). Managing conversations when you disagree politically. American Psychological Association. https://www.apa.org/topics/stress/conversations Kennedy-Moore, E. (2020, November 14). Handling political disagreements in the family. Psychology Today. https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/growing-friendships/202011/handling-political-disagreements-in-the-family Swanson, K. (2017, August 22). Experts agree: Don’t avoid political conversations with family members. Vox. https://www.vox.com/first-person/2017/8/22/16171270/partisanship-politics-discussion-family  Have you ever felt like you were too harsh on yourself? Or find it hard to understand difficult situations? Many people, including me, find solace in self-talk and diary writing to process emotions and reflect on days past, present or future. When unrealistic advices such as “you’re being too emotional” or “get over it” fails, there is one way that can help you cope with understanding emotions or situations simply by shifting perspectives. Taking on a different perspective in situations can have psychological, spiritual and philosophical implications and can be just as practical when your thoughts are present or when you have something to write on. It is called illeism, philosophically it means to refer to yourself as third person. Similarly, if we are self-reflecting and processing information in this way we are behaving as an observer and in psychology that is referred to as self-distancing. There are many benefits to being an observer of our own story and on the contrary being our own first person (self-immersed) can consequently be aversive to trying to understand emotions. This method is an easy alternative for those finding it difficult to psychologically distance themselves through imaginative means. Many therapists will employ ways of trying to get you to imagine a situation as an observer however not everyone are visual learners and not everyone can have great imaginations. Self-talking or inner monologues are a great way for auditory learners and diary writing are great for tactile learners. Overall, these all come under the same umbrella term of psychological distancing which means to remove yourself from your own situation and being the observer. Research shows the many benefits that self-distancing can have, and they are including improvements in emotional regulation, decision making, deriving meaning, reasoning, bias, wisdom, intellectual humility, rumination, open-mindedness and empathy. Most importantly the decrease in symptoms of stress, depression and traumatic events as well as lowering in blood pressure is evident for a physiological and psychological interaction. On the contrary, self-immersed individuals have been observed to have increased rumination and a higher emotional activation in the part of the brain associated with depression. Spiritually, illeism is common practice and is a sign of enlightenment in Buddhism and Hinduism as it is an act of removing your physical body and spiritually observing the world. Referring to self in third person can also be a helpful way to communicating to infants as seen on children televisions shows such as Sesame Street as well as parents referring to themselves as mum and dad. However, research has only been investigating the illeism during self-reflection or diary writing, and little is known regarding interpersonal communications. With the many benefits of self-distancing, it can help in making sense of things and can be done anywhere and anytime. It is mostly helpful in thought processing for experiences of anger, sadness, or confusion and is well adaptive for those preferring visual, audio or tactile ways of learning. So, whenever you’re trying to make sense of things, take a few minutes to breathe and absorb the situation, then self-reflect by self-distancing. References:
Ayduk, Ö., & Kross, E. (2010). From a distance: Implications of spontaneous self-distancing for adaptive self-reflection. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 98(5), 809-829. https://doi.org/10.1037/a0019205 Gerin, W., Davidson, K. W., Christenfeld, N. J., Goyal, T., & Schwartz, J. E. (2006). The role of angry rumination and distraction in blood pressure recovery from emotional arousal. Psychosomatic Medicine, 68(1), 64-72. https://doi.org/10.1097/01.psy.0000195747.12404.aa Grossmann, I., Dorfman, A., Oakes, H., Santos, H. C., Vohs, K. D., & Scholer, A. (2019). Training for wisdom: The distanced self-reflection diary method. https://doi.org/10.31234/osf.io/a5fgu Gupta, S. (2018, February 8). The 'psychological condition' that binds Narendra Modi, Rahul Gandhi and Arvind Kejriwal. ThePrint. https://theprint.in/opinion/the-psychological-condition-that-binds-modi-gandhi-and-kejriwal/34281/ Hills, L. (2017, December 22). 10 journaling tips to help you heal, grow and thrive. Tiny Buddha. https://tinybuddha.com/blog/10-journaling-tips-to-help-you-heal-grow-and-thrive/ Kross, E., & Ayduk, O. (2017). Self-distancing. Advances in Experimental Social Psychology, 55, 81-136. https://doi.org/10.1016/bs.aesp.2016.10.002 Kross, E., Davidson, M., Weber, J., & Ochsner, K. (2009). Coping with emotions past: The neural bases of regulating affect associated with negative autobiographical memories. Biological Psychiatry, 65(5), 361-366. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.biopsych.2008.10.019 Lenski, T. (2016, August 2). 5 uncomplicated ways to gain psychological distance during conflict (and why you should). Tammy Lenski. https://tammylenski.com/psychological-distance/ Nortje, A. (2020, October 28). What is psychological distancing? Four helpful techniques. PositivePsychology.com. https://positivepsychology.com/psychological-distancing/ Shpancer, N. (2020, December 9). A science-based technique for coping with stress. Psychology Today. https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/insight-therapy/202012/science-based-technique-coping-stress By Joseph Duong (Team Member)  When thinking if therapy is for you, there will be times when you’d wonder about your therapy provider. There will be some terminology in Australia regarding therapists depending on their educational background which leads to what they can offer you and in turn what you can benefit from them. What do they have in common? Firstly, we must look at what therapy means. Therapy is a form of treatment aimed to relieve emotional distress, mental health problems or to improve overall well-being. There can be many types of therapies; psychotherapy has an emphasis on feelings, thoughts and behaviours that can be utilised to improve you and are administered by professionals including counsellors, psychologists and psychiatrists (Healthdirect, 2019; Psychology Today, n.d.). General Practitioner Many times, your General Practitioner (GP) would be your first point of contact. They will be there to listen, advise and offer treatment as they are all trained in mental health (Radiant, n.d.). Some GPs can be qualified to offer in-depth mental health advise so it should be good to ask about their mental health training (Blashki, n.d.). Otherwise, they can refer you to specialised professional. You can also see one without a referral however you won’t be able to take advantage of the Medicare rebate available for psychologists, psychiatrists, occupational therapists and social workers. Counsellors or psychotherapists The counsellor and psychotherapist titles are unregulated in a way that some can complete a short course whilst others would have spent 6 years at university with a master’s degree (Willis, 2018). Nevertheless, counsellors and psychotherapists would have undergone countless training and are extremely important in the world of therapists. To be registered for Australian Counselling Association (ACA) or Psychotherapy and Counselling Federation of Australia (PACFA) there requires a set minimum training and ethical standards test. Counsellors and psychotherapists differ from others simply because of their background education which tends to be more practical, emotional and evidence-based (Radiant, n.d.). Counsellors and psychotherapists slightly differ by the method and subject matter. Counsellors specialise in practical and noticeable problems hence focus on trust and relationship building support (Radiant, n.d.). Psychotherapists deal deeper with psychological stress hence focus on past and beliefs. Both can utilise evidence-based practices such as Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT) and Cognitive-Behavioural Therapy (CBT). Psychotherapists tend to incorporate alternative creative therapies such as art, music and dance in their practice. Psychologists The use of the title 'psychologist' is legally protected in Australia, and can only be used by professionals who meet the regulating national boards' requirements. Psychologists are registered with the Australian Health Practitioner Regulation Agency (AHPRA) and the Psychology Board of Australia (PsychBA), following completion of a minimum of 6 years' tertiary study and internship program. Completion of the National Psychology Exam is also required for psychologists registering after 1 July 2013. The continual use of the title 'psychologist' requires professionals meeting annual requirements set out by the national boards. Some psychologists with a Master, Doctorate, or Doctor of Philosophy degree may be endorsed with one or more specialised areas of study. Having an endorsement means the psychologist has completed a national board approved tertiary study program in an area of endorsement, and has also completed a registrar program of up to 3000 hours. Areas of endorsement are:
Psychology has many areas of study which leads to a variety of jobs that exists now. Many endorsed psychologists are experts in behaviour work with severe cases of mental illness (clinical psychologists) or they can work with mentally healthy people in the workplace (organisational psychologists). Many specialise with specific demographics like children (educational and developmental psychologists), the justice system (forensic psychology) or in developing healthier interventions for the public (health psychologists). Psychologists, like counsellors, can offer talk therapies but can work with coping strategies, provide psychological assessments, testing and developing interventions and programs (Radiant, n.d.). Psychiatrists Psychiatrists are like medical psychologists, meaning they can prescribe medicine as well as do psychotherapy. There is a strong emphasis on the collaboration between psychologists and psychiatrists for updates on forms of treatments (medicine or therapy) and their successes. Because they are doctors, they would have completed a minimum 11 years of training including medical school, placements in hospitals or private practice, followed by postgraduate studies to be registered via the Royal Australian and New Zealand College of Psychiatrists (RANZCP). Psychiatrists have a medical background and a deep understanding of relationships between biological and psychological to then diagnose and treat psychiatric issues (Willis, 2018). Because of their extensive medical training, they are suited for complex mental or biological health conditions such as schizophrenia, bipolar disorder, severe depression, eating disorders and addiction (Radiant, n.d.; Willis, 2018). Others In terms of mental health care, there are so many that utilise parts of psychological or counselling techniques. Some rely heavily on it including social workers and occupational therapists, whilst others are focused on work or life improvements such as coaches and mentors. Part of partaking in therapy is finding whether there is chemistry with the therapists and with such diverse background’s counsellors, psychologists and psychiatrists can have, they offer their invaluable incentives to client compatibility. Knowing what therapy each profession uses, as well as who they work with and their educational background can really help you narrow the situation down to seeking out effective therapy. Each profession has a role which fundamentally helps each other all the while helping individuals and society function as a better person than they ever were. References: Healthdirect. (2019). Psychotherapy. https://www.healthdirect.gov.au/psychotherapy#:~:text=Psychotherapy%20is%20a%20group%20of,to%20work%20towards%20changing%20these Psychology Today. (n.d.). Therapy. https://www.psychologytoday.com/au/basics/therapy Radiant. (n.d.). Counsellor, Psychologist or Psychiatrist: What’s the difference? https://myradiant.com.au/2020/11/23/counsellor-psychotherapist-psychologist-or-psychiatrist-whats-the-difference/?fbclid=IwAR1lwKCFCG_5e9xwz30LcAhu7gdqiaLoYrn3ZjZYB6jGnAtRekfdVqIPoUc Willis, O. (2018). What you need to know when choosing a mental health professional. ABC (Australian Broadcasting Corporation). https://www.abc.net.au/news/health/2017-12-04/choosing-a-mental-health-professional/9189026 |
Lily Phan PsychologyLily has almost a decade of field experience working with children and parents, adolescents, adults, and families in private practice, hospital, and community settings. Lily is passionate about her work as a psychologist and believes in the value of therapy not only for reducing symptoms and improving mental health, but also for clients to learn skills and tools to create more fulfilling and meaningful lives. Archives
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